Taken from synergisedsolutions.com

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Family values. The big fuzzy cloud where all reasoning stops functioning.

Try as I might have, I still have yet to extract a coherent argument from any family groups all these years. How do gay people undermine the family unit? After all, if I am going to be destroying some invaluable family value by kissing girls, I should at least know what that is, right? But, I decided to do them a favour, and by painstakingly combing through several family values ‘ sites[and incurring irreparable mental trauma as a result], I am extracting the points that aren ‘t clouded by religious fervour.

Jerry Falwell, I am doing you a big favour by actually bringing some coherence to the ravings of your minions.

We will see a breakdown of the family and family values if we decide to approve same-sex marriage, and if we decide to establish homosexuality as an acceptable alternative lifestyle with all the benefits that go with equating it with the heterosexual lifestyle.   Jerry Falwell

As an argument to make the public rally for their side,  ‘family values ‘ is a worthy cause, something with great moral appeal to every one no matter what their religion. It is easy to get fathers and mothers anxious over the integrity of the family to donate, by claiming they defend family values. It is even easier to get schools and the government to approve their cause, to protect the fragile state of the modern nuclear family, endangered by a menacing environment saturated with sex and violence.

And lest we forget, family values face their most dangerous adversary today: the Homosexual. The Homosexual, in all his capitalised glory, sleeps with every other person who comes his way, and injects his veins with crystal meth. Who seduces little kids from the playgrounds and recruits teenagers to become a Homosexual, like him. Who eventually dies from being whipped one too many times by his newest lover or AIDS.

Sounds familiar?

No, I didn ‘t think so.

On TODAY newspaper, i read an article entitled “Scientific and medical communities are divided on whether it is a disorder. Is homosexuality truly normal?” dated 09 Feb 2006, Thursday. It is in support of Liberty League (an organization that does reparative therapy). By Thio Su Mien.

I was irate when i read it.
She said that “science has no probative value as scientific truth”. What she meant is: theories cannot be proven (but they can be refuted). It takes several replications before it is considered somewhat credible. But would the public know this? No, she gave the public the impression that science has no value. Specifically- the science of psychology.

Thus, in that statement, she slapped all the psychologists of the psychology department of NUS; as well as the mental health professionals situated in IMH. She also slapped psychologists all over the world- their expertise; their training and their credibility.

However, she does subscribe to research that agrees with her agenda… for later she used Spitzer’s research to back her up that homosexuals can be “changed”, and thus implicitly indicating that they should be. (How convenient for her to use research when she needs it. Kind of two-faced, don’t you think?)

And here’s the second reason why i was exceedingly upset with her. She used Spitzer’s research without considering the commentaries that NUMEROUS other professionals have made regarding Spitzer’s piece. There were so many commentaries showing the major limitations in Spitzer’s paper.

Nearly 10 years ago while I was searching for my community I sat in front of the computer chatting via irc with a bunch of new-found friends happy with the compatriot ship that was unavailable for LGBT people in an oppressive environment.� Those were the days when the internet was fast becoming a haven for people like us desperately seeking a way out of the closet.� We conversed in a room named #lesbiancafe that has since closed down.

I will never forget this particular conversation we had with one another about how the room #lesbiancafe is meant for lesbians, a safe place for the queer ladies.� One of our friends, a transgender FTM, asked us if she will still be welcomed after her surgery which will see her transition not only physically but legally into a man. We were a little stumped, not quite sure where to place the rules on our dear friend who is going to be outside the boundary markers one day.

We were very young then but we knew in our hearts that she was our friend and she must be embraced and welcomed anyway.� Rules, regulations, fairness and thoughts of being politically correct/incorrect were not on the top of our list.

That was my first lesson into diversity and empathy.� To know that the community and the world were larger than #lesbiancafe and because we know what it means to be excluded, we need to expand our gates into the horizon so that we can embrace the stranger.

Fast forward to now, I�m constantly amazed and challenged by the intelligence and sheer determination of the Sayoni women.� We spend countless hours debating, fighting, agreeing and poring over complex strategic and sometimes emotional issues that come with activism.� With our sheer diversity, we learn every step of the way the meaning of respect and family and we imagine a future for our community and seek to create it so that the others will live in it.

Today, we�re proud to announce the official launch of Sayoni, a Singapore-based platform for lesbian, bisexual, transgender and queer Asian women.

We hope to shape and hand over the tools to women so that they can carve out their voices.� In our long and fruitful journey together we aspire to become a part of the larger reality, nurture a connectedness with the world, and search for who we really are deep down inside, our wells of affirmation and strength that were passed down to us by our mothers.

Through the platform of a publishing site and a forum, we trust the power of words in sharing, in dialogue and disagreements that will propel forward the unfolding of our thought process and the essence of our very being.

Our name, Sayoni, signifies the origin of life, myth, womanhood, feminism and sexuality. A new beginning and we welcome you to be part of the Sayoni family.

A column by Sheila on being a minority of a minority and thoughts on being politically incorrect.

Many don’t like that I talk about this

Its there, can’t be ignored.

I am a sari wearing, spice eating brown woman. what’s wrong with that!!!!

I have been told I am too angry.

My lover’s mother told her, “Don’t care if you a queer just have a chinese gf!”

Doused in perfume by another whose mother say Indians smell bad.

Another tells me that I have to be a submissive little Indian wife.

Everywhere I hang out, I hang my indianess at the door.

Have you seen a sari-clad chick making out at a bar?

In the faceless internet. I am asked. What race are you?

WELL. I am just racy, in my sari clad chest-busting blouse kind of way.

I am tired of reaching out, tired of looking.

Is there not one woman that can feed me thosai?